Sunday, 27 March 2016

Days 3-6 (1-4 of stimms)

DAY 3 - day 1 stimms (p.m. only)
So I've clearly not been keeping up my blogging duties, but I've definitely been busy busy with all the injections and pill taking.

So first night of stimms I was so so nervous. Like, had no clue I would feel that way given I had done it before. I wasn't nervous to actually give myself the needles so much as just mess it up somehow. My hubby took some video of me doing it all which I might try and cut down and post below at some point if I get a chance, but forgive me if it never happens as I'm a little distractible at the moment and the full video is like 20 minutes long since I was such a nervous wreck.... No one wants to watch 20 minutes of me pouting haha.

:) possible video placeholder :)

I got it all done in the end and went to bed feeling pretty proud of myself. Plus... we had officially begun our cycle of IVF stimms and I was looking forward to moving forward. Yay.

DAY4 - day 2 stimms (p.m. only)
I woke up day 4 (day 2 of stimms) feeling pretty a.o.k. I didn't sleep great, a bit of tossing and turning as the meds started coursing through the ole body. I went about my day quite normally. Then Homme InFertile got the call. HE GOT A JOB!!! So if you've been following my blog you might know that we are Canadians who moved down to New York for his job. Well, oil and gas markets essentially crashed and the company layed off his whole team (and many others). Since he was sponsored to work, and that job no longer existed, we were in fear of being deported. All this as we had started IVF. Ridiculous amount of stress. All of that was lifted with one phone call. Phew. That being said, we're Houston, TX bound next. His whole team got picked up so we'll be moving with people we know which is nice... and best of all is that we get another 6 months in New York while they ramp up coverage. That means I get time to finish IVF (and a frozen if needed) before leaving, as well as take time to say goodbye to this great city and do all the things off my NY bucket list before we go! So great! 

So we were off to the boss' to celebrate... just one hitch. I had to do my shots. Luckily everyone knows our situation so I just brought them along for the champagne toast and shot myself up in their living room. Infertility accommodates no one ;) 

I feel it necessary to include a little commentary here on that whole situation though in case you find yourself in a similar circumstance. Now know, although my husband works with these guys, 1 of them knows me better than the other, and neither of them are overly familiar with me yet, so comfort levels aren't incredibly high. One guys wife, although very sweet, I also don't know all that well... so this wasn't exactly a group of close friends if you get what I'm saying...

So what I found interesting was their curiosity and wanting to look/stare, but their blatant efforts to not! I tried to crack a few jokes to make everyone more comfortable, and they gave me a few kind chuckles to break the awkwardness, but you could definitely sense they didn't know how to act. Totally fair. Now I could have gone off to the bathroom and done it in privacy sure. But I'm pretty stubborn and believe I shouldn't have to hide my life. I don't do it in the bathroom at home. I do it in the comfort of my living room, perched on the couch (or in my bed for the morning shot this morning that I'm writing). Not only that, but I WANT them to see what it's all about. I WANT people to understand what an infertile or person going through IVF goes through, because for the most part, it happens behind closed doors, and under hushed voices. Me? Infertile here loud and proud. I refuse to let someones discomfort with it be the reason I don't educate and break down the stigmas. So there you have it. Everyone in that room now knows exactly what IVF injections look like, and what the woman has to go through with organizing, timing, mixing (lupron/menopur I'm looking at you!) and actually self-injecting. 

DAY5 - day 3 stimms (p.m. only) 
Today my friend arrived from out of town. I went for acupuncture beforehand, and the hubs and I went for a game of pool with one of his other unemployed but soon to be re-employed colleagues. I was still feeling pretty good, although a little more bloated and uncomfortable again today. Acupuncture seemed to have helped a bit there... I listened to circle and blooms IVF program while I had it done. Ahhhhh. 

When my friend got in we were able to go grab a quick bite before having to head home for my nightly shot. Once again, I know she felt discomfort. This is a friend I know very very well, and have been friends with for years, but we haven't lived in the same city since we were 18 (we're 31) and although we know each other very well, the comfort level may not be the same as it would be if we were around each other more often. Once she realized we could joke through it, and it didn't have to be a big serious thing, she loosened up, but it was interesting for me to see the same sort of behaviours and reactiosn as the previous night with Homme InFertile's work colleagues, as I did with a close friend. Huh. 

DAY6 - day 4 stimms (a.m. & p.m.)
Woke up this a.m. knowing I had to add Ganirelix to my regimen. Wasn't so worried about it. No biggie. No mixing... no adding/changing needle heads. It's prepared for me and ready to rock and roll. WELL...... little did I recall this is the little guy that stings like a ... well stings bad lets just put it that way! I forgot the little trick that my last clinic/nurse taught me of pre and post icing. I just went in without a care in the world. Ouch!!! My stomach was quite red and a large circumference stung. I grabbed ice and remembered it was my friend, making a mental note for all mornings to come.

We spent the day out and about. Homme InFertile had to go meet with new boss for lunch, and a few other things came up for him, so it was just my friend and I out playing tourist. I got to do some things in NY I had really wanted to do for some time (aka boating on the lake in Central Park, and taking the boat cruise around the Statue of Liberty). We came home, had some down time, played a board game and I took my evening shots before heading out again. 

Well... evening shots have taken a turn. A dark, dark turn. Eep. I dunno if it's because of the added morning shot or what, but my evening shots SUCKED. Not only was my stomach all of a sudden way more sensitive, but about 10 minutes after taking them I looked 4 months pregnant. I'm a pretty skinny minny, so I understand this doesn't look like much, but I'm generally completely flat. The bloating was sooooo painful. Felt like my insides might pop like a balloon if I sticked myself with another needle. 

But the show must go on so we went out for dinner where I stuffed myself further and felt even more bloated, and then showed my friend Time Square before heading home and me collapsing in bed in pain. Hosting during IVF apparently is a no go ;) I should have known, but at the same time, the distraction is kind of nice. 

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